One of the common mistakes about crossdressing that I made when I was young was thinking that I had to find someone to help me buy clothes and do my makeup. It is indeed easier if you know someone, but there’s still a lot you can do on your own when you’re just starting out. I definitely waited longer than I should have, but frankly I was just scared and lacked confidence in pretty much everything. At the same time, though, growing up in the 70s it really was a different world before the internet came along. I never even knowingly met another CD until well into my thirties! Now there are so many opportunities to talk to people online, and maybe even meet some of them. And there are tons of free makeup videos on YouTube. One of my regrets is that I never dressed seriously in my twenties. OMG, I would kill to have been taking pictures at that age! But it just wasn’t in the cards. I was so confused and moody when I was young, just kind of drifting through life. Looking back I wasted a lot of time and missed a lot of opportunities. So in a way this blog post is written to that confused kid all those years ago and what I wish I’d done back when I was getting out of high school.

Of course I don’t want to come off like the old fart dispensing wisdom, BUT if I were to give any advice to those starting out it would be not to wait, but to start playing around with makeup and getting some outfits together even if you have to do it on your own. It doesn’t have to be fancy. In fact simple is better when you’re just starting out. I wrote a little thing on dressing tips several years ago here (which probably needs to be updated), but knowing what I know now here’s the simplified version of what I’d do:

To start out I’d shave my legs and my whole body, or as much as I could get away with. Of course I didn’t have much body hair back then so it wouldn’t be a big deal. Then I’d get some inexpensive makeup from Target or the dollar store to practice with while watching YouTube videos. Then I’d slowly acquire some simple outfits, starting out with tight-fitting shapewear and pantyhose – Legg’s pantyhose has a nice sheen and are pretty inexpensive. For a bra I’d probably just stuff it with panties or birdseed in used pantyhose legs till I had the money for breast forms (I was broke back then). And finally I’d look for some cute outfits again at Target or the thrift store or on Ebay, maybe even something like leggings with a houndstooth pattern, for example, or tight skinny jeans, which can be a sexy casual look if you can pull it off. And of course I’d also get a wig or two on Ebay, definitely with bangs, or from discount wig stores online.

None of this has to be very expensive. The main thing that’s required is to just sit down and practice with the makeup and the clothes until you start to put together a “look” for yourself. And then the next step is to eventually work up the courage to go out dressed, maybe to a munch if you’re in a decent-sized city, or going to clubs with friends, or just going out alone if you have to (and trying to be safe). If I’d had the sense to do all this when I was young I would have been on top of the world and not even known it. But like I say, I didn’t have a clue back then and didn’t know where to start. In any case, that’s my take on what I should have done all those years ago – it seems really obvious to me now! If you’re closer to my age and grew up before the internet, let me know what your experiences were like starting out and at what age you became more active with dressing. I hope this maybe helps someone out there a little bit…Hugs, Sandra

photos by Delilah Knotty

I can’t believe the year is almost over! It’s been an interesting one, to state the obvious, and for me it’s ending on a pretty good note. I’ll admit I did get into a bad place emotionally at the end of the summer, feeling down and anxious about the future. I wasn’t doing very well but I got over it. I’m much better now, and the holiday season has always been my favorite time of year. As I’ve mentioned before, rumination and worry are one of my main bad habits, and they can really bring me down. So lately I haven’t been thinking as much and it’s been really helping! And I’m only half joking. I’ve been reading some things about worry, rumination and mental health, and something just clicked for me. So I’ve been doing less brooding and less negative self-reflection, which I hope to keep up into the new year. Eeyore has always been my spirit animal but his more carefree friends have always seemed much happier.

On a much sadder note, one of the more shocking things this year was the death of Nicci Tristan last summer. As I mentioned earlier, I didn’t know Nicci that well but obviously she was amazingly talented and almost everyone in the CD and fetish scenes knew of her. One odd thing for me is that there were never any details released as to how she died, at least as far as I know. I hope I don’t sound morbid wondering what happened to her and it’s really none of my business. But for me her passing just hit close to home, and in a way I find it hard to wrap my head around it when the circumstances seem mysterious. There has been some talk and speculation that I’ve heard online, but it’s all hearsay. I don’t like to use the word “closure,” as I think it gets used way too often, but I do hope that eventually we may know more, just to be able to put her death in more perspective.

On a lighter note, as for Trannies In Trouble I’m thrilled that the site is still humming along. At the same time I can’t deny that the tube sites such as Pornhub, and the vast amount of free pics and videos out there have had an impact on the naughty website business. I get by but there are days when I wonder if running a paysite is really a smart thing to do as a business nowadays. But hey, I’m still making new pics and videos and have had some really fun shoots this fall, including the recent pics with the hood and bow neck blouse shot by Michael Keye, whom it was great to see again. Besides, I’m a stubborn sort so I intend to keep doing the site as long as I can. As I say every year, thanks so much to everyone who’s a member and supports the site, or has supported it in the past, even if you’ve just joined for a month or two. You’re the ones who make it happen. And if you’ve ever wanted to join and check it out in more detail there’s a join link on the What’s New? page where I post the weekly updates.

One thing that blows me away is that Trannies In Trouble is closing in on its fifteen year anniversary early next year. I’m hoping I can make it to twenty years and beyond. But along with all the new photo shoots this year I do have to admit there are things I didn’t make much progress on. I still would love to put together a special CD / trans bondage magazine, like the one that XDresser Magazine just put out in the UK, where I was honored to be featured, along with Nina Jay and Jessica Dee. And as for those explicit galleries that I talked about shooting earlier, well, again, not much progress at this point. There are some explicit pics that I have in the vault, so to speak, private things I’ve shot but nothing for online publishing. So that’s just where I’m at.

So it’s been a mixed year for me, but like I say it’s ending on a high note. The TEASE Parties are always fun, four times a year, and we just had a really fun one a couple days after Thanksgiving. If you’re in the L.A. area be sure to check the site and see if one’s going on. In the meantime, I hope everyone has a nice time over the holidays. I’ll be spending a few days in Denver with my family over New Year’s Eve. All the best to everyone in 2018, and I hope everyone has more of the good variety of trouble in the year ahead! Hugs, Sandra

photos by Delilah Knotty

The first TEASE of the New Year will be on Saturday, January 27th, here in North Hollywood, CA. (with cute artwork by Jessica and featuring Dani Doll.) If you’re in the area come on out. Who knows? you just might end up tied up and gagged – good luck with those resolutions!

A bondage fan named Seiler recently wrote me with some cute text to go with the front page on T’s in Trouble, giving the back story leading up to my predicament. I thought it was pretty clever…

“Forget something, Ms. Gibbons?”
You spin around, heart pounding. “Vicki!”
“Just thought I’d check up on you, sweetie. Working after hours? You’re quite the busy bee!”
“I… I just had to finish one last thing… add a file here and—”
“Add a file? Or subtract one?” She flicks the light on. You squint in the sudden glare.
“I… I was just leaving,” you stammer, wet under the armpits. “Wha… what’s with the tape?”
She chuckles cryptically. “I think it’s time to put you out of operation for a while.”
“Out of operation?”
She steps toward you. “I’ll make a deal with you, sweetheart. Cooperate and I won’t go to Mullins.”
Mullins! You shudder. He’d not only kill you: He’d torture you before he did it—and then he’d slaughter your entire family.
“Okay, okay,” you say. “I’ll cooperate.”
She knew what you’d been up to. She knew that you knew. You understood each other perfectly.
“Turn around,” she says. “Hands behind your back.” She tapes them together, crosswise, deftly, firmly, with the alacrity of a pro, then throws a jacket over your shoulders and spins you around.
“Where are we going?” you ask.
“Your place.”
“My place? What for?”
“Ever missed a day of work, Ms. Gibbons?” She steers you into the hall.
“No,” you murmur, puzzled.
“There’s a first time for everything,” she chuckles. “We’ll make this look like a robbery, okay?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Why, don’t you see, Sandra? I’m doing you a favor. A quid for a quo. You just stay quiet and nobody’ll ever know a thing—no file, no data, no snooping. You’ll keep your job. Income. House. Watch your kids graduate. It’ll be just a robbery, that’s all. An ordinary break-in. A confrontation with some low-brow crook. In a month, you’ll be just one more statistic in a dreary list of statistics. That’s fine with you, isn’t it?”
Now you get it. By faking a robbery, you’ll have an alibi when the crap hit the fan—when Mullins found out about that missing file.
“You’ll cooperate then?”
“Of course,” you reply.
“Well!” she exclaims in mock admiration. “Not only industrious but smart too!”
There were worse things than being tied up, or than spending the rest of the night—and probably much of the next morning—bound and gagged.

I had a slight moment of shock a couple days ago when I logged onto the Trannies In Trouble Yahoo Group and nothing came up, just some generic Yahoo graphics. I thought, “Hmm, that’s strange,” rebooted my computer, tried a different browser, but I just couldn’t bring up the Group. At first I was thinking that maybe it got deleted by Yahoo, something I’ve always been prepared for in the back of my mind, since, well, it is an adult group and adult content often gets axed. But then I saw a bunch of comments on Twitter about Yahoo Groups being offline. So it was down for about two days and then finally came back yesterday.

Yahoo has certainly seen better times, but I remember the early days when it was one of the main places to see CD Bondage pics and talk to other people who were into them. I started the Group back in 2003, and well, I’m a stubborn sort and a bit sentimental so I plan to keep the Group going for as long as Yahoo is online and doesn’t delete us. If it ever did get deleted, I’d post something on my website and over in the Fetlife Group and on Twitter. In the meantime it was kind of a nice lesson for me not to take it for granted. See ya over there!