It’s shaping up to be a really nice visit here in L.A. I left the other day to a big stormstorm in Colorado with some good plane de-icing action and then touched down to 70 degree days in Burbank. It’s already been busy with a couple good parties – was at Threshold’s Femme Fatale party last night and saw lots of friends there. And Thursday night I was able to get to the Oxwood Inn for their weekly karaoke night. It was a blast, with some really good singers and a very receptive crowd (and no one being “uninvited”). I did Cheap Trick’s “Surrender,” one of my favorites and almost always a good crowd pleaser. With just the right song selection, karaoke can be a breeze, even if you sing lousy ;-) This coming week I’m hoping to be taking some new pictures (and seeing Michael Keye again in about a week) then more parties and things next weekend. I’m sure it’ll fly by…
This was a tough weekend. As I’ve mentioned here before, I’ve been going to a straight bar here in Denver, the Santa Fe Tavern, that does Friday night karaoke, and several other crossdressers and TG girls have been going too for the last six months or so. I’ve really enjoyed it and almost always had a nice time hanging out with friends. The owner and staff always seemed happy to see us and treated us well. Then Saturday morning I read a message that was forwarded through Facebook informing us that the management felt our presence was scaring off other patrons and that the trans-community was uninvited and asked not to return. Reading it, I felt that emptiness where you don’t feel much at all – just a vague disbelief and surprise, as though certainly it’s all a big misunderstanding. But no, apparently we’re really not welcome anymore.
The news left me rattled pretty bad and is especially bewildering since, like I say, it always seemed that we were accepted. The irony for me is that I found my first year in Denver to be kind of tough, and this bar was the first place I found where I felt like I really clicked and connected. It was like, oh, I’m finally making some progress in this city. So to be turned away is especially disappointing. I’ve had minor hassles before and was followed once leaving a club, but I’ve never been told by an establishment that I’m simply not welcome, so this is a new one for me. There’s not really much to do about it. Legally, I’m pretty sure a bar owner can choose whom she wants to serve, and who wants to go back to a place where you’re not wanted anyway? So I’ll be trying to find someplace new to go. Anyway, I’m heading to L.A. for a visit later this week, so maybe the timing is good for a little break to shoot some new pictures and go to a few L.A. parties, including the Club Fantasy party on November 4th.
Rope bondage has always been my favorite kind of bondage, although I have gotten more interested in handcuffs and restraints in the last couple years. One site I check out from time to time is Felix Dartmouth’s Archives BBS which features lots of handcuff bondage and models in ultra-feminine fashions. It’s a good site that I’ve joined a couple times, although maneuvering it can be a little confusing, as it’s laid out in a unique database-style format. There are quite a few free pictures on the link above if you click around on the site.
I really love the picture directly below with the hinged handcuffs, and I’d love to get an elbow binder like that. I’ll have to check out Handcuff Warehouse in more detail when I have time to see if they carry something like that, but if anyone has a link there or at another vendor please post it in the comments section. They have several with just the nylon straps but I really like those steel pieces that slip over the nylon. It looks utterly inescapable, which is one of the advantages and turn-ons of handcuffs and restraints. Again, although rope is my favorite, if I were ever going to try to really keep someone captive for a long time, I’d use duct tape or handcuffs or cable ties. It’s just really tough to make rope truly inescapable unless you don’t care about injuring your captive, and you just cinch it down as tightly as you can – of course, not a good idea to really hurt people! Anyway, I’ll never stop doing rope bondage but I would like to do more handcuff and restraint pictures, as they can be just as sexy when done well.
I just re-did the links page on the site and uploaded it here. I liked the older design too, which I had up for about three years, where you could submit and add your own link to the page, but over time it attracted more and more spammers and I would have to log on twice a day just to delete the junk links for cialis and penis enlargement. So I finally decided to go back to the old design and scrap the add-your-link feature. If you know of any good links I should add, especially for crossdressing bondage sites, feel free to send me an email or leave a comment here.
Self Denial – My three-month orgasm control program was interesting and, technically, a failure. As I wrote earlier, I tend to enjoy my kinks more the fewer orgasms that I have, so it can be exciting to spread them out over a period of time and try to go weeks between them. My plan was to limit releasing myself to only once per month. I was able to do that for the month of July and strangely enough it wasn’t that difficult, though at the end of the month, when I was at Fetishcon, I was starting to climb the walls. August and September though were suddenly much more difficult and I broke down and had two orgasms for both of those months. In September they weren’t even that far apart, about six days, I believe.
So although five orgasms over a three-month period isn’t very many, I simply wasn’t able to control myself as much as I had hoped to. In fact, by the time that September came, I was going a little crazy and am actually surprised that I only had two for the entire month, as I could have easily had many more. So for now, I’m going to take a break from the program and just try to space things out as far as I can, but without any specific numbers in mind. It was an interesting experiment and I would highly recommend trying it for anyone who’s curious about orgasm denial or chastity. When you go a long time without any release it can really add a heightened intensity to those moments when you get turned on, and it can make it just mind-blowing when you do finally give in. If you’re really lucky you can sometimes have the kinds of orgasms that you remember years later, rather than the usual duds (almost like blowing your nose) that I’m so familiar with.
Email and Twitter – My ability to keep up with email is as bad as ever, with a long queue of messages that I may or may not get to. I know when it reaches that overwhelm point, quite often I simply never get around to replying. I really dislike doing that (it really sucks!) but I know there are many people over the years whom I’ve never gotten back to and I hope they don’t resent me for it. Friends and contacts whom I see in real life I try to make an extra effort for, but sometimes I’m bad even with them, especially when my mood is low, which as I’ve mentioned several times on this blog, happens more often than I like to admit.
I also haven’t really had a lot to blog about lately, and feel like I’ve been neglecting things here, but I have lately been fairly active on Twitter. I actually find I like it a lot more than I expected and I kind of wish all emails were limited to 140 characters – I’d be completely caught up if they were! My profile is here and there are a lot of other bondage people on the site too. It’s really easy to post individual pictures on Twitter too, much easier than on the blog, so I’ve been posting some pics there too. I don’t own a smart phone so thankfully I can’t go around all day long texting messages to post, which is for the best. And I’d hate to be one of those fanatics who tweets fifty times a day. Believe me, my life is not THAT interesting. I’m also on Facebook and Fetlife, so if you’re on those sites and would like to send me a friend request, please do. I say yes to most everyone, unless you start sending me political emails!
So that’s my exciting update – not-very-succesful orgasm control, way behind on email and posting random sexy pics and silly cartoons on Twitter – Yes!
I had a really fun time shooting recently with Ohphelia and Cincher and just wanted to post a few frame grabs from the video that we shot a couple weeks ago and that I just posted on the site. I finally come out as a crossdresser to my aunt Ohphelia and she introduces me to bondage as a way to make me more submissive. Of course, if I’d really had an aunt like this back when I was a teenager I would have been in heaven!