One of the things I try to do is be open to other people, especially people I don’t know and run into during everyday activities. I often fall short but it’s something to aim for. I do a fair amount of walking and hiking in my guy mode life and when I’m out and about I like to make eye contact with people and say hi or good morning if they seem at all open to it – nothing more than that, just trying to acknowledge the other person. If someone has their ear glued to a cell phone or is intently studying the ground, of course, I won’t say anything. But so often, maybe especially in a big city, it seems people generally go around avoiding each other, refusing to make eye contact or even smiling. I don’t think it has to be this way, though maybe I’m being a bit of an idealist.

So this morning when I was out walking, I was in an area with a lot of homeless and “interesting” people and this guy with only a few teeth was approaching, maybe listening to an iPod, I couldn’t tell for sure. He was looking right at me, so I smiled and nodded and said, “Hey,” and as he’s going by I hear him saying, “You better watch you’re f**cking mouth.” It was actually kind of funny. I didn’t feel in danger or anything, since I think he was talking to his own inner demons as much as me. But it was like an illustration of exactly the kind of thing I would often tell myself, that I have to “watch it” or “be careful.” And I’m not sure that being careful has really served me that well over the years. I know I’ve shut myself down and told myself I couldn’t do something or wasn’t good enough many times, all in the name of being careful. Of course, there’s reasonable caution, such as not walking down a dark street in the city in full drag with six inch heels. But there are many areas in life where taking some risks can really pay off.

Okay, I know this is probably sounding pretty New-Agey but that’s what’s on my mind. Maybe I’ve been in Southern California a little too long.