Monthly Archives: April 2026

LGBT Orgs, life in general

Bryon Noem’s Bad Week

Leave a comment

As so many have commented when news of Bryon Noem’s bimbofication fetish came to light, very few are kink-shaming him for what he’s into—certainly not me. I’ve met quite a few gurls with similar fantasies! But the first thought that came to mind when I saw his now-notorious photo was, “Girlfriend, with some makeup and a nice wig you can take this to the next level!” And with the money he’s reportedly been spending on cam girls he could certainly afford some high-quality breast forms—ditch the balloons and get some really huge realistic-looking knockers!

There is of course the massive irony that he’s married to a woman with such a strong anti-LGBTQ record, including her stance against drag shows on campus, not to mention her own history of playing dress-up for the camera as the former face of the DHS and ICE. But I really just feel sorry for Bryon Noem. What he did was stupid and reckless considering all the controversy surrounding his wife. It makes you wonder if he secretly wanted to be found out. (To paraphrase Freud, every fear is a wish). But once that picture came out, I would suspect that Bryon Noem probably thought of killing himself, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s had a few moments since then where self-annihilation might still seem like a reasonable option for him. I’d be more surprised if he didn’t have an initial suicidal impulse—it would be almost inevitable after such a degree of public humiliation. He’ll be known for his bimbo fetish for the rest of his life, the defining moment of his life—this poor guy with bad judgment and worse dressing skills.

No one is asking for my advice but if he was, mine would be to own it. Come up with some humorous lines when talking to the press to show that you fully embrace your kink and, yes, work a little more on your look. Maybe do a photoshoot makeover in Vanity Fair magazine the way Caitlyn Jenner did years ago. But the only way to get over something this huge (pun intended), is to learn to laugh at yourself and not blame anyone else. Initially there were reports that one of the cam girls he was seeing online, Lydia Love, had leaked the photos, but since then it appears likely that she simply commented on the photos once they were already out there, confirming that he was a client: “Did I expose him? No. None of those pictures are from me. I just told my story.” I’m still not really sure how the pictures got released. If one of the girls he was talking to online outed him non-consensually, well, that wouldn’t be cool at all, regardless of one’s political leanings.

And regarding that marriage, well, if Kristi Noem were also his Domme that would make it even better! It does appear though that she’s already been cuckolding him big time if the rumors are true (and her alleged affair was already being reported as the worst-kept secret in Washington back when she was still head of the DHS).

So again, I’m not kink shaming Bryon Noem, though the massive irony of the story is still pretty funny. And it’s generated, of course, some killer memes. Team Bryon!

life in general, los angeles

The Do-Me Queens I’ve Known

Leave a comment

I hesitated as to whether I should post this, since it’s critical of a certain kind of person and behavior that you find in the bondage and kink scene. But I finally decided it was worth bringing up. To set the scene, way back at one of the TEASE parties a middle-aged crossdresser showed up. I welcomed her to the party, and we chatted for a bit and then within minutes she came out with, “So when are you going to tie me up?” I smiled and chatted some more but did not take the bait. She would drift away and then come back again throughout the evening, asking again when this party was gonna get started and why it was taking so long for her to get tied up?

I immediately thought to myself, “Ah, another do-me queen.” I’ve run into a lot of do-me queens over the years, but she was so bold and pushy that I still remember her probably fifteen years later.

If you’ve never heard the term before, a do-me queen (as defined in the Double-Tongued Dictionary) is “a selfish, submissive sexual partner, especially in a male homosexual relationship.” But do-me queens are also very common in Domme / sub relationships and certainly in the kink and bondage scenes. Pro Dommes are extremely familiar with the type. But when someone is willing to pay they’re probably not a true do-me queen since the Domme is getting something in return. Same with phone sex sites like Niteflirt (where I have a profile). Some people do like to text me there and just chat about things. And some are extremely focused on their sexual desires, but since they’re paying me it’s fine and I really wouldn’t expect otherwise. Again, I’m not really sure if that’s really a do-me queen or just someone who’s very horny with a credit card.

The thing about do-me queens is that they can be so laser focused on their own sexual needs that they become socially clueless and irritating. The mantra is basically, “When are you gonna do me? When are you gonna do me?” Of course, a cute twenty-year old can get away with being needy and demanding much more easily than, say, a middle-aged crossdresser who doesn’t take very good care of themselves. When strangers write me and ask if they can come take a vacation and have me put them up for a few days and play with them, I usually know what I’m dealing with.

If you’re asking, “Uh-oh, I hope I’m not like that,” asking the question is a good sign that you probably don’t take things to that same degree. But I would say there’s a spectrum of behavior when it comes to being overly selfish about one’s desires. We’ve probably all had moments when we’re really turned on or have a promising opportunity come up and we become very focused on what we hope to get out of it. That seems normal, especially when one is really horny. And I’ve had moments myself when I’ve gotten a little tipsy and logged onto Niteflirt as a customer and was probably a little too focused on getting my itch scratched. That’s the kind of night where the next day I can wake up and go, Okay, well that was a bit much. Was I showing some do-me queen traits then? Yeah, probably.

But for me anyway, what really sets the do-me queen apart is the social cluelessness. The person talking to me at that party was just looking for a good time—I get it. But her hyper focus on her needs without any concern as to whether I would even be interested is the thing that made it such a turn-off for me. With her attitude there was no way in hell I was ever going to play with her. And her inability to read the situation just made it worse. She really didn’t need me to tie her up; she needed a bondage robot that she could program to tick off all the boxes of her fantasy.

Again, I wasn’t sure if I should write all this since I don’t like to put people down on this blog, but it is a subject that deserves to be discussed, and a type that people should know about, especially if someone is unknowingly starting to exhibit some do-me queen qualities themselves. And again, the defining trait here is the social cluelessness and inability to consider what makes a scene mutually beneficial. It’s really not that hard to figure out. But until those bondage robots become affordable for everyone and reliable (not short circuiting during a session or accidentally asphyxiating their owners as so often happens), I’m sure I’ll continue to get more of this unwanted attention. When you’re known for tying people up it kind of goes with the territory.